{"id":56029,"date":"2018-03-25T03:26:19","date_gmt":"2018-03-25T03:26:19","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.mixedracestudies.org\/?p=56029"},"modified":"2021-06-10T00:34:55","modified_gmt":"2021-06-10T00:34:55","slug":"so-after-a-pregnant-silence-she-told-me-the-story-of-how-she-met-somebody-just-before-she-met-the-man-i-thought-was-my-dad","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/?p=56029","title":{"rendered":"So after a pregnant silence, she told me the story of how she met somebody just before she met the man I thought was my dad."},"content":{"rendered":"<blockquote><p>In 2004, my mother and I were having an argument and she called me a \u201cBlack bastard.&#8221; And I\u2019m like, even if you want to hurt my feelings, who says that? Call me stupid. call me whatever, but \u201cBlack bastard?\u201d Where did that come from? So after a pregnant silence, she told me the story of how she met somebody just before she met the man I thought was my dad. She doesn\u2019t really remember a whole lot about him; it was a short-lived relationship. But he was Black. African American. Of course, I was shocked. But I also had a sense of relief and affirmation. And while I was having a lot of questions\u2014I wanted to know who this man was, I wanted some evidence\u2014all these pieces just fell into place: why my lips were bigger, why my skin was darker, why I didn&#8217;t look like the rest of my family, and perhaps even why I gravitated to the people and things that I did. It just explained a lot of things that I had a hard time explaining to myself. And it made me feel like perhaps all the choices I had made were not necessarily mine to have made. Maybe in a strange way my biological father had been guiding me towards myself all along. \u2014<a href=\"http:\/\/www.zunlee.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Zun Lee<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>Yaba Blay, <a href=\"http:\/\/www.mixedracestudies.org\/?p=32590\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><em>(1)ne Drop: Shifting the Lens on Race<\/em><\/a>, (Philadelphia: BLACKprint Press, 2013). 92-93.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>In 2004, my mother and I were having an argument and she called me a \u201cBlack bastard.&#8221; And I\u2019m like, even if you want to hurt my feelings, who says that? Call me stupid. call me whatever, but \u201cBlack bastard?\u201d Where did that come from? So after a pregnant silence, she told me the story [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[7992,15283],"class_list":["post-56029","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-excerpts","tag-yaba-blay","tag-zun-lee"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/56029","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=56029"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/56029\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":56031,"href":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/56029\/revisions\/56031"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=56029"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=56029"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=56029"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}