{"id":57186,"date":"2018-12-30T21:10:26","date_gmt":"2018-12-30T21:10:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.mixedracestudies.org\/?p=57186"},"modified":"2018-12-30T21:28:05","modified_gmt":"2018-12-30T21:28:05","slug":"together-for-four-decades-married-for-four-years","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/?p=57186","title":{"rendered":"Together for Four Decades, Married for Four Years"},"content":{"rendered":"

Together for Four Decades, Married for Four Years<\/strong><\/em><\/a><\/p>\n

The New York Times<\/a>
\n2018-12-26<\/p>\n

Alix Strauss<\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/a>
\nPaula Martiesian<\/a> and Ken Carpenter<\/a> in the yard of their home in Providence, R.I.<\/a> The couple met in college at Rhode Island School of Design<\/a>. She\u2019s a painter, he\u2019s a musician. Gretchen Ertl for The New York Times<\/em><\/small><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n

Because marriage is an ever-evolving experience, we constantly shift, change and, in some cases, start over. In It\u2019s No Secret<\/strong>, couples share thoughts about commitment and tell us what they have learned along the way.<\/em><\/p>\n

Who<\/strong> Paula Martiesian<\/a>, 64, and Ken Carpenter<\/a>, 65.<\/p>\n

Occupations<\/strong> She is a painter, he is a musician (mostly jazz) and composer.<\/p>\n

Their Marriage<\/strong> 4 years, 2 months and counting.<\/p>\n

Through the Years<\/strong><\/p>\n

The couple quietly married Oct. 20, 2014, in an unplanned ceremony in the living room of their house in Providence, R.I.<\/a> A friend officiated. \u201cSince 1975, we were considered married by common law<\/a> in Rhode Island<\/a>,\u201d Mr. Carpenter said. \u201cWhen same-sex law passed a few years ago, common law wouldn\u2019t be accepted and we wouldn\u2019t be considered married anymore. The government needed a certificate; we didn\u2019t.\u201d No photos were taken, and the wedding was a surprise to all.<\/p>\n

They met in 1972 as students at the Rhode Island School of Design<\/a>, from which both graduated. Ms. Martiesian was 18 at the time and Mr. Carpenter was 20. \u201cHe was really talented, hard working and so secure,\u201d she said. \u201cHe was skinny and cute. We didn\u2019t really date; we fell into each other. He was a musician and I drove him to a gig he was playing at. I consider that our first date.\u201d<\/p>\n

And that\u2019s how it started. \u201cA black man from Harlem<\/a> and a white girl from Pawtucket<\/a>; a painter and a musician,\u201d Ms. Martiesian said. \u201cRacism swirled around us everywhere we went.\u201d…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

And that\u2019s how it started. \u201cA black man from Harlem and a white girl from Pawtucket; a painter and a musician,\u201d Ms. Martiesian said. \u201cRacism swirled around us everywhere we went.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[12,8,20],"tags":[29194,29196,2640,29195,5568,2327],"class_list":["post-57186","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-articles","category-media-archive","category-usa","tag-alix-strauss","tag-ken-carpenter","tag-new-york-times","tag-paula-martiesian","tag-rhode-island","tag-the-new-york-times"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/57186","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=57186"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/57186\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":57189,"href":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/57186\/revisions\/57189"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=57186"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=57186"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mixedracestudies.org\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=57186"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}